There are times in life when the question of knowing if one can think differently than one thinks, and perceive differently than one sees, is absolutely necessary if one is to go on looking and reflecting at all.
Michael Foucault
Just last week I turned to my husband and said, “All I could think about during dinner was how different their discourse was growing up than mine.” He looked at me oddly and I explained myself…
Let me explain to you… My husband is a Rabbi. I grew up Jewish but in a very secular home, which means we did not highly emphasize religious practices on a daily basis. It was a quite a surprise when I brought a Rabbi home to introduce my latest crush to my parents. Now, for obvious reasons, our family is involved in a lot of religious activities. I often find myself asking my husband “what does that mean?” Or “what am I supposed to do now?” Having been in this new world for about 3 years, I am continually learning new things and expanding my personal discourse to adjust to my life as a Rabbi’s wife. We were at dinner with a group of 4 different Jewish leaders that had all had religious lifestyles growing up and it seemed as though they were speaking a different language as they were referring to things I had never heard of before. As I sat there dumbfounded, I thought about how much I need to learn to be a part of this world, and understand it. Michael Foucault’s quote resonates with me because of where I come from, what I have learned, and what I plan to do with it.
Where do I come from?
This semester I gave great thought to who I am and how my personal experience has prepared me for what I’m doing now. It also taught me how to interpret people. I have thought about the people in my life who have influenced me and helped me understand the students that I teach. I have reflected on past students that have demonstrated similar qualities to those we have read about and how I wish I had taken this course before meeting those students as I might have interpreted their actions differently! I am aware now of how it is necessary to understand where someone else is coming from to best understand who they are and how they learn best.
I am fortunate to be able to say that I have not had to change who I am, or learn to act a certain way to be able to succeed in life, much like Delpit and Dowdy described in their articles. I understand now that for some, it is a necessary means to earn the respect of people around them. Yet I am somewhat a hybrid of two discourses in that my parents came from two different worlds. My father came from upper class society whereas my mother’s family was working class. I know how to communicate and situate myself appropriately with both classes, which has proven helpful in both my teaching and situational aspects of my husband’s line of work as well.
I am a storyteller like Francis, Ezra, and Chol. I have had many worldly experiences in my life from student teaching in Australia to traveling Europe and working with Serbian and Kosovo refugees, to teaching in the inner city of Chicago. Just like Perry encouraged with her students, I will share these stories from my life so others can learn from them. In the same respect, I will invite my students to share their stories, because it is important to have a voice and be heard.
What have I learned?
As shown in my story above, our readings have provided me with a frame of mind where I make note of new things now that I wasn’t aware of previously. For example, I was talking to my principal on the last day of school when some other co-workers joined in the conversation. They were all black and I’m white. As soon as they joined the conversation, my principal began to code-switch and speak differently than she had with just me. The readings gave me this insight and honestly it made me feel valued that my principal felt comfortable to speak like that with me involved. As Foucault points out, I find myself looking and reflecting at the happenings around me with a closer eye.
In our readings, one repeated issue I had was the assumption that students have literacy deficiencies (ex. Daniel and Zonnie) when in fact, the teachers and students often have difficulty understanding each other. The teachers, because of their hierarchical role, judge the students to be lacking in ability when really miscommunication is the primary concern. Looking at it from an outsider’s perspective rather than being the teacher involved, I realize the importance for a teacher to look at her students and reflect about what the real problem is. If I have a whole class that does poorly on an assignment, was it the students, or was it my teaching and clarity as to the expectations of the assignment? I think many teachers blame the students for their lack of achievement when oftentimes the teacher needs to reflect on changes they could make themselves.
Miscommunication is not the only problem we focused on. Lack of getting to KNOW your students kept coming up in the readings (ex. Laurie and Jake). There are many positives to paying attention to who your students are. First, the students will be grateful that you want to learn about them and will probably be willing to work harder for a teacher they know cares. Second, if you seek out what interests them, they will be more motivated to learn because you choose subjects they take an active interest in. A good teacher makes things relevant to what is happening in their students’ lives. As Iris Murdoch states, “I can only choose within the world I can see…” (p. 151). As I am stressing the point that I need to see beyond my own world to grasp my students’ perspective, I cannot yet expect them to do that yet. As Hicks stated, “like other things in his family life, reading had to make good sense to be something of value to Jake” (p. 120). I need to find what my students value, and then I will likely make a stronger connection with them and provide them opportunities to be more successful. Third, you will have a better idea of what obstacles the student really has, and how best to work around those obstacles. Finally, when you get to KNOW your students, you form relationships with them that involve trust, as Henry and Staples alluded to in their articles. For some students, they don’t find that trust in their home life, and you become someone they depend on and look to for guidance and support.
What do I plan to do with it?
Looking forward, I am about to step out of my comfort zone and expand my discourse yet another notch. I am accustomed to teaching little kids. Next year, I have just taken a challenge to teach 5th grade. I also am going to work in a mostly white school when I’m used to teaching in the inner city. This is going to be a culture shock yet I chose this because I am looking forward to working with a unique team that I can collaborate with and learn from, an experience I was not getting at my former school. As I am challenging myself, I will also challenge my students. Since I am teaching predominately white students from rural North Carolina, they will need me to tell stories, and share about different cultures. Hopefully they will share a piece of themselves with me I will offer them a curriculum that “embraces listening, watching, feeling, and understanding” (p.13) as Hicks encourages. Most importantly, I will continue to look and reflect with an open eye, to what my students needs are and try to meet their needs on a level playing field.
-- Carrie Brown