These chapters were a real eye-opener. The insight they provide into the lives of children is a an excellent reminder that our experiences dictate who we are in all facets of life. This has been the most difficult thing I've had to learn in the process of becoming a teacher. I grapple with this understanding on a daily basis. Our schools run on middle class norms. I was raised with these ideas and expectations, so this is nothing new to me. In fact, this is my comfort zone because it was (and is) my reality. I have to remind myself to step out of my skin and into that of my students each day when I become disappointed or frustrated by a situation. My biggest learning experience came as a first year teacher. One of my students failed to return his homework assignment. This was the third time in as many days and I was annoyed that he wasn't being responsible. I spoke with him, expressed my dismay, and punished him. It was later that morning that I found out that the father was abusing the family. The night before he beat the mother, who fled with the children in the middle of the night. This poor child had little sleep and was dealing with the emotional turmoil in his home. My concern? His failure to return his spelling homework. Can you imagine how TERRIBLE I felt? Needless to say, I apologize profusely, hugged the child (and didn't want to let go), and encouraged him to talk to me about anything. Regardless of what had happened, I would be there to help. (Given the way the morning began, I'm sure he didn't feel that I was someone whom he could turn to.) WHAT A LEARNING EXPERIENCE! Now, whenever something happens with one of my students, I ask WHY. And I try to be very kind in my interactions when I'm doing it. By gaining insight into HOW our students home lives are, like in chapter one, we gain a strong understanding as to their behaviors and motivation in situations in and our of the classroom.
Chapter 2 really hit home with me. While I can't relate to the manner in which the teacher was spoken to (I can't imagine!), I can relate to feeling a lack of respect for being female. A student in my class, I'll call him John, comes from a terrible home life. His father is not a good role model, to put it politely, and John idolizes him and everything he does. John's father curses at neighbors, with John at his side, kicks the family dog, with both actions garnering laughter from John. John has even spoken of watching movies with "naked women" in them with his dad. (Upon further questioning he denies it.) When I met with John's parents, he was incredibly disrespectful to the mother and was rude with me. (He wouldn't even look at me to acknowledge I was speaking.) John's lack of respect for me and the other female teachers working with him is evident. He does, however, respond positively to the male teachers who also work with him in the school. Sadly, he won't always have male teachers in every classroom, as the school systems are dominated be females in the role of classroom teacher. Because of this, John won't wholeheartedly embrace learning and education unless there is an intervention of some sort. A child's strongest role model is the same sex parent. Unfortunately, when this parent has a lack of parenting skills, children like John and the boys in chapter two are the ones who suffer.
Children are usually ready to share their experiences, especially in the younger grades. As a first grade teacher it seems that I can't get through a lesson without one of my students wanting to share something they're excited about in their lives. When thinking about Roadville, I'm floored because part of my classroom community is my students sharing their life experiences. I want my students to know that their experiences matter just as much as mine or the other teacher (PRT) in my classroom. By validating their stories, they feel like what they have to say is important. This, in turn, builds their confidence and self-esteem as being an important part of their classroom family. I simply can't related to Roadville.
These two chapters come down to one basic of importance: Our experiences determine our thoughts and actions. We don't come from the same life experiences, so we have to reach out to our students and their families to know and understand what is happening behind closed doors. This insight and knowledge will help us, as teachers, to reach our students on their most basic level of understanding. It will also serve to support us as compassionate human beings.
Comments (8)
oh jeanna...your story of your student was painful to read. bless your heart. maybe you punished him but you did realize what was going on in your child's life and you fixed it the best you could. that definately demonstrates the kind of teacher that you are...caring and understanding. we as teachers learn and grow daily. it appears that what you learned in that one day was tremendous. thank you for sharing your story.
i recently wrote about social services being involved in one of my student's home life/culture. i have been dealing with social services for what seems like the entire school year. she lives with mice and roaches and filth and no running water and at times no electricty. mom and dad have fought to the extent that they have kicked out windows in their home...they are now boared up. she also had to escape the house and run to a neighbor's house when her parnets were fighting with knives! they have no air-condition...and at times no food. she is feed and taken care of at school. what will she do in three days?
last week she stole a child's pencil pouch to put water in and take home and she also stole another child's snack and was eating it at 9:30 in the morning. without knowing this child one might think to refer her to the office for stealing. but bless her soul, she is hungry and thirsty. she now has a water bottle on her table so that she is never thirsty at school...and i always feed her a snack because she never has one in the afternoon.
it is amazing what our students go through in their home lives. thank you again for sharing your story.
donna byrd-wyatt
Posted by donna byrd-wyatt | June 5, 2007 6:00 AM
Posted on June 5, 2007 06:00
Jeanna,
This is a great analysis, with examples from your professional work, of the main themes in these chapters.
I think that they way in which you critique your ways of knowing and being are wonderful. All children should have teachers who are willing to examine their assumptions and have the courage to say "I'm sorry" when they are wrong. Good for you.
Alecia
Posted by Prof. Alecia Jackson | June 5, 2007 10:21 PM
Posted on June 5, 2007 22:21
Jeanna-
Your description of your student and the homework situation is all too real. We see so much of this at my school. Most of my students come from single family homes and at the end of the day mom is still at work, too tired to help with homework, can't help their child do homework (yes, even in Kindergarten), there is no quiet place to work and/or there are no resources in place so the child may complete their homework (paper, crayons, pencils, etc.). This is so sad. Since the vast majority of my children are in this situation I don't even do a lot of homework anymore other than reading. I loved that you were honest about this issue, you learned from it as I have from my children and their issues.
Posted by Lisa Outland | June 6, 2007 3:39 PM
Posted on June 6, 2007 15:39
The example you gave about the child in your class is a prime example of how we have no idea what children go through on a day-to-day basis and how it affects them at school. That was a sad situation with your child. We hear this at my school too often. It was good that you were able to go back to him, apologize, and be an encourager. It is sometimes unfair that later in life, children are blamed for their behaviors and learning when all they are is products of their environment. Not saying this makes it acceptable and if they get in trouble when they are older, their home lives should be taken in account, but it seems as though it should play some part in the decisions that are made about these children. For instance, I have an 11-year-old cousin who was abandoned by his mom and is in foster care. He was with my mom, but he got himself taken out and placed in a foster home. He suffers from Reactive Attention Disorder and is ADHD, but this is not looked at when he gets in trouble or acts out. He is blamed for what he does. I know he needs to be able to control his behavior, but right now he is not able to and he is falling apart because of his home life. Society doesn't overlook this and say he is not to blame. Although we know children are not to blame about their home life, they are expected to act well in spite of it. I think we need to consider children’s home lives when decisions are made about their learning and behavior.
I agree with your point: Our experiences determine our thoughts and actions. We have to remember this and try to reach all students.
Posted by Danielle Griffin | June 6, 2007 8:11 PM
Posted on June 6, 2007 20:11
Jeanna,
Thank you for sharing this story with us. We too have encountered the same situation and later on that day, the school counselor would come into our rooms and ask to speak with that child because of an incident that happened at home that required police protection and social services involvement. How quick we are to reprimand and not seek and ask why? This is all too real and heart wrenching.
For me, these chapters were difficult to read. However, with these stories you all are sharing with us, may make the readings a little easier to comprehend.
Again, thank you for reliving and sharing these painful "moments".
Posted by Shirley Mathis | June 6, 2007 8:30 PM
Posted on June 6, 2007 20:30
I am glad that you got your head wrapped around those two chapters because by reading your post I was able to understand them better. I now understand that the author was trying to portray how our everyday lives bleed into how we act in all situations. I only slightly understood that to begin with but now I truly understand. I was brought up a certain way and that is the way that I control my classroom, treat my students, and relate to other teachers at my school. My only question now is this; what about the people who rise above their upbringing? What about them? How do they fit into this situation as teachers I mean? For example, my cousin was brought up in a very abusive home and now she is a school counselor. I think I am still only on the edge of understanding for these two chapters, but I am getting there.
Posted by Kristen Billings | June 6, 2007 10:10 PM
Posted on June 6, 2007 22:10
My wife, I met many years ago at a party. Chris is immediately caught my eye. She had long blonde hair back then and a great figure. Although, so here I was, I raised them. We talked about our future plans. Christiane has entrusted to me that she has always dreamed of being able to work with an international company. They also wanted to buy a nice house with a large garden and garden sauna. Moreover, they wanted to establish in the shortest time a family. Chriastiane did a very nice impression on me. We've talked the whole evening together. We have this very well understood. It has been proven that we have the same hobbies, so travel and cars. We began to meet regularly. After 5 months I have been married Christiane. I was very happy that we have concluded the marriage. After a year we bought a beautiful Gaus, a cook and garden sauna. Chris was overjoyed. I was also glad each time when I have seen Chris smiled. She is my half. I can not imagine how my life will be like without them.
Posted by Gartensauna | April 13, 2011 11:19 AM
Posted on April 13, 2011 11:19
I want to congratulate Dave Annable & Odette Yustman. I hope this will be perfect couple in the future.
Posted by Term papers for sale | April 24, 2011 1:49 PM
Posted on April 24, 2011 13:49