RES 5530: Race, Class, and Gender in Literacy Research (Spring 2009)

Critique is understood as an interrogation of the terms by which life is constrained
in order to open up the possibility of different modes of living;
in other words, not to celebrate difference as such
but to establish more inclusive conditions
for sheltering and maintaining life that resist models of assimilation.
-Judith Butler

This semester has been one of extensive self-reflection. Not only have I learned a great deal about various cultures and discourses, but my own perceptions of myself and others have also shifted. Day one of this course marked the beginning of my transformation; however, the end of the semester will not be the end of my conversion. The quote by Judith Butler summarizes my learning experiences thus far. I believe that her statement describes the ideal world--one that is ever-evolving, and contains no “status quo.” We should never accept the constraints of society in an attempt to assimilate. Rather we should maintain our character and identities in an attempt to improve the world around us. My job as an educator is to foster this same idea of personal growth in each and every child that I teach. If we are ever going to be a “salad bowl” nation, this idea of a protective model of civilization must be accepted and adhered.
From the very first essay that I read by Judith Baker, I knew that this course was going to be “different.” Rather than reading and regurgitating for a test, I was going to have to read, internalize, and process (very high on Bloom’s taxonomy I might add). Soon after I read about Baker’s idea of “trilingualism” and multiple discourses, I began to notice it in my classes. Not only did I observe it, but I also encouraged it more. My English Language Learners began to see “Buen Hecho!” on their papers as opposed to “Good Work.” Our classes recently engaged in debates regarding proper discourse (yes, I explained to them, on a very basic level, what it meant). This tied in nicely when studying various cultures around the world, and how certain groups of people are discriminated against because of their discourses. We even talked about their parents--many of whom barely speak English, and the prejudice that they face. After reading about the emphasis that Hick’s places on connecting the child’s home life to the curriculum, I felt that it was necessary to extend the debate to include their own parents.
A constant theme that I believe was reiterated throughout several of the pieces was the need for global children. Chapter ten of The Skin that we Speak suggests that our children should be exposed to multiple languages. Not only will this make them more intelligent, but also more tolerant. Next year, I think that I will do a simplified language study with my seventh graders. Using the various countries of Asia and Africa, I want to talk about word origins, and study how some languages have been used to hold some groups back (some still do). Through this study, I hope that kids will learn to appreciate their own language, as well as others. At the same time, they are reflecting on social issues, a point that Moller and Allen suggests is imperative. My ultimate goal for these “world citizens” is to provide a neutral environment for them to learn about the world. With new Skype technology in our school, I hope to connect with various schools across the state, country, and world. In my opinion, there is no better way for the students to “critique” the world.
The readings have also forced me to reevaluate my method of giving assignments. Each and every time that I pass out a project, I hope that I think about Kay, and her quest to find a voice. Since reading about Kay’s writing journey, I have begun to give options for most work that I assign. One thing that I have learned this semester is that every person is different; therefore, we should not assume that all children learn the same way. If we, as teachers, are to truly nurture their personal growth, we have to make adjustments to accommodate their learning style. To take this one step further, state governments who dictate curriculum need to understand this as well. Teachers, alone, cannot change the education world. As long as our state continues to view all students as one body, never fully “critiquing” society, things will not change. Since I began this course, I have begun to solicit support from various teachers in my community to begin a letter-writing campaign to the state government presenting them with many of the ideas regarding multiple discourses and the various approaches that children take in order to learn. I finally realized that teachers can complain in lounges, offices, and classrooms all that they want, but until they put that verbal exchange into action, it is to no avail.
If the first half of the semester helped me to understand multiple discourses, and that various types of learners exist out there, the second half helped me to understand exactly what “discourse” entails, and why certain children behave the way that they do. For example, the idea that a child from a working class background will act out at school makes perfect sense to me now. Of course, they feel threatened. At home, they have mastered their discourse and have power; however, at school, they are not comfortable and often shut down. It also explains why children do not want abandon their peer groups. Often, this is their only comfort zone at school. Also, as Bell Hooks explains, many of these children want to explore areas beyond their comfort discourse, but are afraid that this will affect their place in their home environment. Utilizing these resources, I have slowly started to understand my children for who they are. Without even realizing it, I have begun to have more patience with students that I may have dismissed before. I truly want to understand their discourses.
As a person (not a teacher), this course has allowed me to examine myself. I now understand how my past has shaped and formed the person that I am today. As a southern woman, like Hicks, I grew up within a unique discourse. I had a wonderful childhood, oblivious to any thought that my family was different from any other. However, I quickly learned that being southern can produce a negative stigma in the minds of others. Therefore, throughout my teenage years, I fought vigorously against all things southern; however, as I began to grow up, I realized how truly special my culture was. I came to understand that I added something special to the world, and I should not adapt my way of life in an attempt to assimilate. Although many aspects of my life are different from those of my family, my home discourse is internalized, and will forever be a part of who I am.
Finally, in the ending pages by Hicks, I began to realize that as a teacher I have to walk a thin line. Not only do I have to assert myself in the classroom, but I also have to place myself at the children’s level to truly understand them. As teachers we can never accept a situation for face value, or get “stuck in our ways.” In order to shelter various discourses, we must tend to them much like we would a new flower. As the reading suggests, we have to get out of our comfort zones to reach the children. My visual goal for my classroom is now a large flower bed--full of shrubs, evergreens, perennials, and annuals. Even though each of them requires unique attention, with my individualized help, they will uniquely bloom to form a beautiful masterpiece. As Judith Baker suggests, it is my responsibility to “open up the possibility of different modes of living.”

Heather Coe

There are times in life when the question of knowing if one can think differently than one thinks,
and perceive differently than one sees, is absolutely necessary if one is to go on looking and reflecting at all.
Michel Foucault

This quote from Michael Foucault speaks volumes about what it means to be an educator and a person. It suggests that looking and reflecting in life requires one to be open-minded and capable of observing and judging from a different point of view. I believe that the ability to view life from someone else's perspective is a gift and a goal that we should all work towards each day. In order to fully understand others and be a productive citizen of the world, we must strive to think like Foucault wanted us to. We must know that we have the ability to think differently than we currently think and perceive differently than we currently see.

This semester has been a reminder that I must not get stuck into a stubborn way of thinking. It is imperative that I remember that each of my children is from a different background and a different way of life. Before taking this course, I have had several courses related to diversity; however, just enough time has passed that I had begun to forget about the many life lessons that are taught through stories such as "As Soon As She Opened Her Mouth."

Upon beginning the course and seeing readings that I had read before, I was a bit skeptical of the course being very similar to past ones. However, thanks to the set-up of the course, it was extremely interesting to read the viewpoints of others. I found it helpful to interpret texts in my own way and then read the responses of others. It is a good experience to be able to step back and consider your differences with other people.

I thought back to an excerpt from my very first post about language barriers. "Language is an interesting concept. It can be a uniting factor in a group of people but also a dividing factor. I remember the first time I traveled outside of the southern United States. I went to Washington DC with a group of peers. I noticed quickly that we sometimes received strange stares from people as we conversed. Then, I went on to make the tragic mistake of ordering sweet tea at a local restaurant. It was a unique cultural experience, and it made me realize that people had differences, even those of similar ethnicities, races, backgrounds, religion, and more. Language and dialect are parts of who we are as people."

Although we often consider race as a dividing factor in society and schools, we do not see language as a problem for many children. Not only a difference in language between English and Spanish, but a difference in dialect. For example, I had never considered the importance of dialect in our society. Then, someone pointed out that I code switch whenever I speak with others. If I am at home, every word that comes out of my mouth is dripping with Southern dailect and phrases like "y'all." Yet, the moment I am interviewing for a position or speaking with a professor, you can barely hear a Southern accent or unusual phrases at all.

Next, I began to consider why exactly I do this. It became apparent quickly that I realize the stereotype and negativity associated with being Southern. I change how I sound in hopes that people do not associate me with anything that is Southern, which is truly unfair. As a person who is constantly torn between embracing my heritage and fleeing from people's ideas, I hope to one day be able to be satisfied just being me.

After investigating my ideas about language and diversity, I realized that this could have a great impact on my own classroom. In my very next post, I examined how my ideas of diversity in language could change a student’s life.

This reminds me again of the troubled student in my class this year. He has responded to very little instruction throughout the course of the year. However, he seems to have more respect for me and will do as I ask most of the time. I think this is truly because I put forth an effort to include him and every other student in every class. I attempt to speak or learn Spanish from my Spanish-speaking students and talk about the sports others play. I think it is extremely important to bring a piece of each and every student to the classroom. I want my class to feel like one family.

This same student has impacted me greatly throughout the year. I feel that my presence in this course has made me more equipped to teach and relate to the child. He is still much more cooperative with me than any other teacher. Just the other day, he stayed after school a couple of minutes rather than running to be first in the cafeteria in order to help me put up the chairs in my classroom. He still expects me to speak Spanish to him and will be the first to laugh at me when I make a mistake, but he truly appreciates my attempts to make him feel welcome.

Then, this post also reminded me of the importance of creating a classroom environment that is open and inviting to all students. My classroom really should feel like a family. Each child should feel that he belongs and has a special niche in my room. Although I realize this and have put a great deal of effort into making this happen during this school year, I have struggled in this area. I cannot seem to make all of my children feel special and happy with who they are. Perhaps this has been made impossible because of the pressures of society and their peers, but this course has helped me in my quest to make this happen.

My peers have given me ideas such as examples of group work and projects like Heather's jigsaw activity. This type of support as well as the encouragement and acknowledgement of great things from others has really enabled me to provide the best education I can for my children this semester. I feel that I have truly grown as a teacher and as a person.

Finally, the coursework forced me to consider gender roles and religion in my profession. I did this by investigating my own past in one of my posts on the book Reading Lives.

As a preacher's daughter, I read the Bible most nights during the week. The first words I was able to fingerpoint read where most likely those from a memorized verse of the King James Version, like John 3:16 or John 11:35. If I wasn't reading from the Bible, I was listening to someone else read from it or a bible story book. Also, my dad would actually ask questions after Bible Story to check our understanding. He would actually level his questions so that the same story would produce a more difficult question for my older sisters and the easiest question for my younger sister.

This reminded me that some children are taught much before they come to school, while others do not have these advantages. Also, it reminded me that religion plays a major role in Southern schools especially. I even titled this posting "Bible Belt Raisin'" to show my Southern dialect and my religious experiences. Because my father was a pastor, I was taught to read and to comprehend through religious text. I knew more bible stories than most adults before I was able to read them myself. My dad, without knowing, improved my oral reading comprehension. He then encouraged me to sound out words in the text. Finally, he also provided me with comprehension questions leveled to my ability so that I would feel successful. I realized quickly that I had a great teacher and that this provided me with a head start in school and life. I was very lucky to have had the home life I did as a child and that is very apparent in the students I teach today.

Overall, the course was very beneficial to me. The type of thinking and rethinking I was forced to do about myself and the differences in myself and others will make me a better educator and person. I have strived to keep an open mind and reflect on my own ideas and those ideas of others. Foucault's quote truly summarizes how I feel about education and about my experience in this course.

Brittany Guy

Ashley Catlett

Critique is understood as an interrogation of the terms by which life is constrained in order to open up the possibility of different modes of living; in other words, not to celebrate differences as such but to establish more inclusive conditions for sheltering and maintaining life that resist models of assimilation. Judith Butler

As a teacher I believe in constant self-improvement and self-critique. In this way, I continually adapt and change as the fields of reading and education change. I feel like a better person if I don’t let myself fall into a rut in my personal or professional life. First, in looking at this quote, we have to agree that life is constrained in ways that are distressing and unfair to some groups of people. The status quo is not acceptable. It is not good enough to say that the USA is a free, just and democratic country. We must constantly analyze and uncover where inequalities still exist.

We study and identify our differences not for the sake of celebrating them. We examine our differences in order to find ways to make life better for everyone. Differences are not deficits, as we have come to believe in education. I like the use of the word shelter in the above quote, as it implies protection. I also agree with the use of the word assimilation, as opposed to acculturation. Our society can include everyone without making everyone the same.

Specifically relating this quote to the readings for this course, I think of the different groups we read about: African-Americans, Native Americans, Sudanese refugees, immigrants, working-class whites. As our diversity increases, we must examine our schools to see how we can be more inclusive of these groups. I tend to be a pessimist when it comes to institutions. However, the main idea I take from this course is that schools can and must change; I cannot sit back and fret, “This is just the way it is done. This is the way it is.” I have a responsibility in the “emancipatory literacy education” of students. I must be a social activist who is opposed to assimilation.

I think one of my most important moments of understanding came when I read the Noll article. As teachers we often blame the lack of success and learning on the home environment. The Noll article really showed that the home life of Daniel was supportive and rich in literacy. It was the school that fell down on the job. The articles and chapters that followed Noll reinforced this. A child who is read to and who engages in literacy practices can be turned off by school, or even feel rejected. That rejection basically undoes everything the parents have done to prepare the child for literacy. I think one of our biggest challenges in education is learning to value discourses that differ from white middle class.

As a member of this white middle class, I have to be vigilant not to fall back into the belief that there must be something wrong with the child if she is not successful. I have to constantly question where the disconnect is. Last week I found myself judging a former student when I found out she had dropped out of high school. I thought to myself, “How hard could it be? Just try your best and stay in there! Why did you give up?” However, I did not struggle in high school and I am not Hispanic in a mostly white school. I have no idea what it was like for her or where the disconnect became so painful that she had to quit. I am not excusing her for dropping out; I simply realize that there is more to it than her being lazy. I must blame the school, too.

Another important understanding for me came from the last chapter of Reading Lives. There is not so much a “set of general theories about ‘what works’ for working-class children (or girls, boys, Latino children, etc.). Rather it is an effort to learn about this community, this neighborhood, this family” (154). Hicks helped me understand that books with titles like, How to Reach Out to Latino Parents might not be very helpful to me. It explains why my parent meetings were not well-attended. It explains why no single reading program for struggling readers is the be all and end all. As a teacher I have to examine the community I teach in. Even more than that, I have to examine my students and their families.

My favorite example from the Delpit reading was in chapter eight about the man who had never been in a car. He was not stupid because he did not know how to operate a car. I am not stupid because I cannot use the four remotes that operate our television, DVD, DVR and receiver! Some things are easy and some are hard, and we all have areas where we need more time and instruction. For some reason, in education we have a hard time understanding that and putting it into practice.

I also appreciate Delpit’s book for the way it has forced me to think about African-American students and not just Latinos. I have studied issues of class and race, but always related to my Latino ELL students. I think Latinos and blacks have a lot in common considering the obstacles they have to overcome. Many of them are in a culture of poverty, or the lower class, which does not mesh with the culture of school. How can we remedy this? I asked that question after chapter two of Reading Lives. I suppose Hicks would argue that we need more qualitative research and more hybrid languages of inquiry. What else can we do as teachers?

I, personally, can continue to look for areas where life is constrained so that I can find new ways to teach and reach students. I can study dinosaurs with my students because dinosaurs are interesting to them, not just because “boys like animals.” I can value a student’s knowledge of farming and tending animals. But I have to show true interest. I can foster respect and caring relationships in my classroom. I can make sure than my teaching is “moral action that creatively responds to the particulars of situated histories” (Hicks 157).

Ashley Catlett

I have to say, before starting this class, I was a little apprehensive of the online format. I had an awful experience with an online class at another university (which will go unnamed!) and was nervous that this would be similar. I guess you could say I was scarred from the experience. In actuality, this class has been one of the most informative and helpful ones I've ever taken. In my opinion, reflection is the most crucial ability for any teacher to have. It doesn't help your or your students if you can't look back on what you've done, assess its worth, and then tweak that to make it better. Especially in our ever-changing culture and society, reflection is a step that many take for granted, but I believe it is the most important. This class has assisted that most-important reflection.

With all of that said, this class has really allowed me to reflect on my practice specifically as it relates to race, class, and gender. As stated before, I grew up in a fairly diverse area and went to high school with a very diverse population of students. I have been somewhat culture shocked in my teaching career though. After teaching in rural Eastern Tennessee, where I was shocked everyday at the amount of discrimination and racist thoughts, I moved to the somewhat more open-minded area of Ashe County. I am still shocked quite often though at the closed-minded beliefs of some of these students, especially those related to Hispanics, Blacks, and homosexuals. This has made me want to up the ante of the amount of diverse material I bring into the classroom. These students may never have the opportunity to read novels authored by Black, Asian, or Hispanic authors. And maybe, just maybe, if they were to read a book by or about a minority, they might just change their views.

So, with my huge emphasis on reflection, it may come as no surprise that the quote I chose was the Michel Foucault one: "There are times in life when the question of knowing if one can think differently than one thinks, and perceive differently than one sees, is absolutely necessary if one is to go on looking and reflecting at all." One of our jobs as teachers is to push the limits of thinking for our students. It is especially important for our high schoolers to start thinking differently. Otherwise, they will have a very unwelcome shock once they move out into the real world or college. In order to do this, the teacher must also push their thinking constantly. What I loved most about this class is how it always made me question myself; I was constantly evaluating my teaching decisions and reflecting on how it impacts my students.This has, hopefully, benefited my students as well. The Skin We Speak was definitely my favorite of the two books, although Reading Lives grew on me. TSWS really challenged my thinking, especially in thinking about how minorities deal with the discrimination that comes with their race. To be quite honest, I hadn't given much thought to the fact that perhaps their literacy was affected by their race. But given language and dialectal differences, that only makes sense now that I've been given the chance to think about it.

I am grateful for this opportunity to study, albeit "virtually," with such an open-minded and supportive group of teachers. Unlike some of you, I haven't had the pleasure of meeting most of you face-to-face. But I have learned a great deal from reading your thoughts and hearing your thoughts on what I've written. I also am grateful for being able to work with Dr. Jackson--it's been a pleasure! And I am so appreciative that the texts that were chosen and the podcasts that were given to us for clarification were so thoughtfully done.

Hope everyone has a wonderful end to their school year!

Christy Rivers

"There are times in life when the question of knowing if one can think differently than one thinks, and perceive differently than one sees, is absolutely necessary if one is to go on looking and reflecting at all." -Michel Foucault
As I write this quote, I have The Byrds song "Turn, Turn, Turn" traveling through my head. This is what this class has caused me to do. Just as the quote suggests there will arise a time when a question will be posed. Are my ideas about learning, about language, about connection fluid, ever willing to be changed and adapted to meet the needs of the children I have been entrusted with? Or are my attitudes and convictions static, unwavering in their fervor, perceiving understanding by how something looks, rather than uncovering its reality? I must truthfully reveal that I unfortunately hang my hat more often in the realm of the perceived rather than the realm of possibilities. When we first read in the Delpit book about Ebonics, I had a very hard time understanding the relevance of such a language. I found it foolish, a distraction from the "king's english" that should be required of everyone. Now, however many weeks and readings later, I am ashamed of my intolerance and narrowmindedness. This class has caused me to ask myself if I am willing to think differently. Where do my formulas for language, its acquistion and use derive from? Am I only regurgitating information and suggestions I have gleaned from my own schooling or personal experiences? Have I ever given thought to personal stories and histories that may shape our language use and understanding?
This class is the next piece in the puzzle to the journey I have been on this year both professionally and personally.
If I take time to reflect in order to move forward, than I need to reevaluate how I determine a child's ability to learn. I often base my perceptions on a child's learning by what he produces, rather than by who he is, or rather, the events of his life that have lead him up to the time he is in my class. Through the Delpit and Hicks books as well as our additional articles,it is clear the personal histories of our students are what impacts their production in our classrooms. What fills their lives outside of school greatly influences what fills the assignments we prescribe at school. Building a bridge between these two kingdoms is key. A child knows how to live as king of his castle at home. He has honed this process, this langauage that is bantered around between the subjects of his family. When he enters the new kingdom of school, he automatically falls to "serf" level when the high propierty of language is thrown at him upon entrance. He becomes a foreigner in this new land, a land he is to reside in and conquer over the next twelve years. This is where my different thinking enters. I am not only queen of my castle, the classroom, but I have been given this great authority to add to those who help me rule my kingdom. I do not hold my hand clenched as a tyrant or despot determined for others to see things my way, but rather I hold my hand open as a host of a great celebration, inviting all to enter in. I believe welcoming each child into this land of learning with the words, "your stories are welcome here, your thoughts are important" sets up an atmosphere of invitation. It is an atmosphere where everyone of us is challenged to think differently, to look beyond what a face holds and examine the heart, the mind, and the soul of an individual.
As I began the readings of this course, I was negative in the first readings. (I cannot reference the name of the authors since I have given The Skin That We Speak to my principal to read.) I did not realize the relevance of identity at first in communication, but rather the differences of speaking in a way variant than the mainstream population communicates. I wondered why can't you just speak the way your teacher is trying to show you? I was saying keep your kingdom over there if you want to enter into mine. I was not looking forward to the next grouping of chapters. However, as we delved into the examination of language and identity, I was caught in a misconception. I was allowing my perception of a populace, or rather my prejudice of a populace to determine my value of their language. I did not really care about their history, yet I expected others to care so deeply about mine. I feel as though this class has allowed me to know freedom in some respects. I have been working hard this year on building community and pouring my time in finding literature which exemplifies similarities and differences. Yet, I was so invested in this endeavor I was neglecting the very people I want to impact, my students. I believe this class has helped me to stop, examine the histories of these children, then go find your literature. Meld where they are and what they've experienced with what a book has to offer. While I maintain my curriculum map and lesson plans, the individuality of the implementation is beginning to shine through. The student I first wrote about needing a topsy turvy with is now a child I am building connection with. Instead of seeing him and his set of idiosyncrasies, I see a boy operating out of what he knows from home. As a parent, I do not buy into a child centered home, but as a teacher I believe this phrase has some merit. I believe my instruction, my planning, my thoughts should be centered on how will this translate to each child in my room? I am pretty ignorant on the language and ramifications of the policies of No Child Left Behind. But I will hold onto the name of this legislation, becasue it rings true. As we have learned together through our readings and our blog revelations, our goal is that no child is left behind in a great expanse between two kingdoms. I have looked at the ugliness of my prejudices and misconceived ideas about people, about my own students, and I feel as though the shackles have been taken off. I have so far to go, but what a great place to start. I am trying to turn, turn, turn from what I have been to becoming a queen who is interested in kingdom building, welcoming all with whatever postcards they bring from the places they've been.
Stefoni Shaw

Text of pleasure: the text that contents, fills, grants euphoria; the text that comes from culture and does not break with it, is linked to a comfortable practice of reading. Text of bliss: the text that imposes a state of loss, the text that discomforts, unsettles the reader’s historical, cultural, psychological assumptions, the consistency of his [sic] tastes, values, memories, brings to a crisis his [sic] relation with language.~Roland Barthes

The past three years have been quite a journey for me. I left a place I knew well, the elementary classroom, and entered a place that initially caused anxiety, fear, and uncertainty. Of course I had been in school before, had excelled in school before, but this new step into the doctoral program felt completely different. It seemed that this new place required a different kind of thinking, a different kind of reading and a different kind of learning. On this end of three years, I realize that it required all of those things and for that I’m quite grateful. The reading and writing that I did in my masters program and continue to do in my doctorate program has changed my thinking as an educator and scholar. It has helped me see the comfort and security in a ‘text of pleasure’ and the struggle and hope in a ‘text of bliss’.

In the beginning reading was always what I did to travel to different places, to learn new things, to get lost in an unusual world. I would curl up on my bed or relax outside under the warm sun and read book after book. Texts of pleasure were always piled on my nightstand waiting for me to make a choice for the night. Those texts did leave me contented, filled with that sense of euphoria that comes after finishing a book. However, what I realize now is that I never challenged myself beyond those books. I never searched out books that might call into question what I believe and push me into a new world of thought and ideas. I never looked for those texts of bliss that made me slightly uncomfortable because it turned upside down beliefs I had held for a along time. However, as soon as I began my masters program, those texts of bliss found themselves in my hands over and over again. IN fact, those texts of bliss have now become what I search for, what I long to read, so that I can think about them, talk about them and grow from them as an individual and as a teacher.

Without a doubt, the pieces we have read in this class are texts of bliss. Each piece was thoughtfully written and filled with meaningful research that has the potential to create educational change. At the same time these pieces promoted change in educational systems and the importance of being informed about what happens in other parts of our world. Two of the pieces from our class seem to reflect all of these qualities: the piece on the Sudanese refuges and Reading Lives. The piece on the boys from the Sudan affected me as both an educator and a human being. First, I was completely in awe at how the boys made it to our country and began to build their knowledge of our language so that they could become active citizens for change. After all that they had been through, after all that they had seen, their main goal was to find a way to help those they had left behind. Learning a new language well enough to use it as a vehicle to support change requires a great deal of dedication and these boys were willing to do that without complaint. As a human being I also began to think about what I do to promote change. With all that I have had and with the little amount of hardship I have lived through, do I give back? Do I work to encourage change in my community, in my classes, with my students? These questions made me realize that while I do seem to encourage and support those around me, I still need to challenge myself to think more about the world around me. I think it is important for me to reflect on how my abilities could be best used to help those who need it.

As I read Reading Lives I also felt myself growing as both a person and a teacher, however, much of what I realized about myself from this piece is focused on the teacher I would be when I enter back into the classroom. So much of who I was as a teacher before I left the classroom has changed - for the better. I think my patience and acceptance for all students has grown in dramatic ways. Before I left the classroom I loved my students and wanted them to do well but I also allowed myself to be pulled into the drama that is an elementary school. I can’t tell you the number of times I was pulled from my classroom, taken from the students who really needed me to work on the yearbook, to plan a party, to attend a mandatory meeting, to calm a teacher who felt slighted by our principal or by a colleague and on and on. Now, with the time I’ve spent reading and discussing texts of bliss like Reading Lives I’ve noticed my weaknesses and have begun the process of building them into strengths. When you read about how teacher alienate students, you can’t help but feel uncomfortable because you know you have been there before. You can’t help but feel unsettled because you have done the same thing before - whether or not you realized it, or whether or not you feel justified in the end. Texts of bliss that create these feelings of discomfort can only serve to challenge us. They have challenged me to expect more from myself and to work hard to reach higher expectations. We have all felt those moments of helplessness like Hicks and the teachers she described. It’s almost a requirement for a teacher to hit rock bottom with a student and not know where to turn, however, it is in that moment of doom where we feel that we have lost the child that we can actually find a way to change things for the better.

Before I ramble more than I should, I’ll end this piece with a reflection on a reflection I’ve made it the past. Texts of pleasure and bliss are both necessary for the development of effective, compassionate teachers. We need the enjoyment of a book that fills our heart with ease and we need the challenge of a book that guides us toward great change. It is in reading books of bliss that we find ourselves, find our purpose and realize in the process our potential. As a teacher I see part of my role is to make sure all of my students know their purpose and work to achieve it. Knowing what you are supposed to give to this world makes it much easier to walk through it. Students like the boys from Sudan and students like Laurie and Jake need help to realize that purpose, so that they know there is a reason for learning and knowing. Asking students to read and answer comprehension questions or to answer 20 math problems does not always show a purpose for learning. We have to work to bring that purpose for learning to the classroom each day so that every child has the chance to figure out who he or she is supposed to be. Again, I have to quote Brian Selznick (2007) in his beautifully crafted narrative of the life of Hugo Cabret,

Sometimes I come up here are night, even when I’m not fixing the clocks, just to look at the city. I like to imagine that the world is one big machine. You know, machines never have nay extra parts. They have the exact number and type of parts they need. So I figure if the entire world is a big machine, I have to be here for some reason. And that means you have to be here for some reason, too.(Selznick, 378).

Maybe the key is to make sure we all have a purpose - because with purpose all things are possible.

Amie Snow

“There are times in life when the question of knowing if one can think differently than one thinks, and perceive differently than one sees, is absolutely necessary if one is to go on looking and reflecting at all.” Michael Foucault

I think this quote means that being open to thinking differently is necessary for growth. I chose it because it reflects my own beliefs and my experience in this class. The search for new ideas is what learning is all about. It’s why I’m in this masters program! This class has been all about allowing myself the opportunity to look at life situations in a new way. As a result, my perceptions have changed; my awareness of both my own life experience and my appreciation for others has increased.

Our readings and discussions have raised my awareness of how language, race, gender and class affect both the learner and the educator in the classroom. It has been powerful to reflect on my own situated history and see how it influences my beliefs and my teaching. I’ve also learned some important insights from the authors and the commentators (my colleagues) about the experiences of others that will help think differently and become a better teacher.

Delpit and Baker helped me to understand the importance of valuing a student’s home language. Since reading their article about Standard English, I’m less judgmental and actively look for ways to honor and validate their home language in my classroom. Using good children’s literature where my students can both see and hear themselves reflected in the text has led to some amazing classroom discussions. “Hip Hop Poetry with a Beat”, edited by Nikki Giovanni has been one of the best books for validating the language and culture of the African American students in my room. They have enjoyed performing the poems for all of us. I know it was important for me to hear first hand accounts of various experiences in order to really understand and empathize with their life story. My own life story, growing up in Maine was relatively isolated. Although I didn’t learn any prejudices as a child, I just didn’t have any similar experiences. I needed to hear their story so that I could understand their experience.

The Sudanese refugees, the African Caribbean teenagers, Danny, Laurie and Jake helped me to understand the power of telling our story. Students need to feel safe enough in our classrooms that they are willing to take risks with their writing. We give them voice when we show them that we respect their background and give them authentic, meaningful and relevant reasons to write. I’ve been trying to give my students more opportunities to choose what they want to write about as well as making sure that all assignments are relevant and meaningful. As a result, I’ve got to know them better. I have a deeper understanding of their interests, values, and beliefs. It has given me opportunities to connect with them on a personal level where we have learned mutual respect for one another. I respect them and they feel comfortable enough with me to share the truth of their lives.

Seeing the classroom through the eyes of students from so many different backgrounds has helped me to find some common themes. It seems that no matter what race, gender, or class the students came from, they all needed one thing from us as educators: respect. When we try to truly understand who they are and what they need as individuals, we show them that we value and respect them. I’ve been mindful of our readings and discussions during my day. I try to remember that the relationships I form with my students are the foundation for the learning I want to impart. I want to teach the whole child, meeting each of them where they are at socially, emotionally, culturally, economically and academically.

I’ve so enjoyed our “discussions.” I have certainly learned just as much from my colleagues as the “published authors” we’ve read. Reading their stories of how they have built relationships with their students and their families has truly inspired and humbled me. I’ve been impressed by Sarah’s idea of making home visits in an effort to truly get to know her students’ families. Stefani Shaw’s story of her student, Jake, reminded me of the power of parent involvement. It’s a lot of effort but it has great payoff for our kids. Their stories and others have made me question and reflect upon my own thinking and practices.

Perhaps one instance in this class that best reflects Foucault’s quote came after reading Hick’s last chapter. This chapter helped me to reflect on my own situated history. It led me to some important self revelations and changed my thinking about Jake from the previous week. The reading and our discussion helped me to recognize that my background and beliefs have a huge impact on my approach to teaching and how I relate to my students. I’ve learned that I’m harder on the working class students who most closely reflect my own experience, while I have greater empathy for others. I’m grateful for this new awareness. I hope that it will help me stay mindful of my own bias in the future.

This class has challenged me to think differently. Now I look at myself and my students through a new lens. At times I have felt validated that my teaching style is meeting the needs of my students. Other times, the authors have “stepped on my toes” and convicted me to change. I’m thankful for the opportunity to change my thinking and grow as an educator.

Jayne Thompson

There are times in life when the question of knowing if one can think differently than one thinks,
and perceive differently than one sees,
is absolutely necessary if one is to go on looking and reflecting at all.
Michel Foucault

This quote by Michel Foucault sums up nicely the transformation that this course has caused for me. I am going to be very honest here, and I hope that this transformation shows. When I first signed up for this course, I thought “ok, this is going to be an easy a, all I have to do is read the materials and blog”. I didn’t think in a million years that my perceptions or opinions were going to be changed at all. I have grown up in a very “don’t believe all the liberal mumbo jumbo, just do your work and make your a” kind of life. I thought this was what I was going to do. I, at first, was not willing to “think differently”. However, as much as I tried to ignore it, and maybe didn’t even recognize, my way of thinking and perceiving was indeed changing.
I believe that my beliefs and perceptions were first called into question when we read about the two Native American children. I read and respected the other articles before this one, but was still having a hard time making a connection with race being an issue. Perhaps it was Zonnie’s connection to poetry and her teacher’s inability to see this that really got me thinking about my literary experiences, especially with my own passion for poetry. When her teacher said that she didn’t know what was going on in her head, I found myself screaming “look at her poems”. I was outraged that someone so talented would be so stifled by standardized testing and education. I began to look into the bigger picture and bring in all of my previous learning of different cultures and lives. I began to change my way of thinking.
This process of change continued on and again, really hit a milemarker with Hicks’ writing. The stories of Laurie and Jake made a profound impact on my life. I started to really reassess my ideas about some of my students. I had always tried to be compassionate, but I wonder now if I was unable to reach some students because I had no idea of how to connect with them.
Now, everyday that I walk into my school, I see Lauries and Jakes running around. I find myself gathering more information about what is going on in their lives so that I can better help them deal with the demands of education. I approach everything in a more understanding manner than I ever have before. I don’t make excuses for them, but I am sensitive to their situation.

The teachings of this class and the inquiry into my own personal beliefs and methods came to a culminating experience for me the other day that sums up what I feel I have learned and I would like to share it with you all. I have a child in my class that comes from an abusive, alcohol driven, bipolar family. This child is very smart, but has a dangerous amount of anger built up and can be extremely aggressive. Before Easter break, he was suspended when another teacher in my grade level attempted to “teach him a lesson” about his actions outside of school at a local Easter egg hunt. The child snapped, and was suspended to his wreck of a home life for five days. We got back from break, and he didn’t come back. I asked his sister, and she said he didn’t want to. I began worrying more and more about this child. I talked to the school counselor trying to do a home visit, but I think they felt a since of relief upon his absence. This past Tuesday, his mother and grandmother pulled up with him in the car. He was kicking, punching, screaming out obscenities, to the point where the sheriff had been called. Both the counselor and the principal went out to try and get him into the school and he would not budge. I asked them for a chance to try. I went outside, and just talked to this angry little boy. I was honest and told him that I had been worried about him as tears welled up in my eyes. I told him about all of the neat stuff we were doing like planting flowers for mother’s day, and I showed him the ones I had planted for him. Then, I explained to him why this mattered. I told him that I knew his life was tough, and that I could never imagine what he had been through, but that education with people who cared could be his way out. I reminded him of all of the people we had read about in class, like Hellen Keller, and Martin Luther King Jr. and how their lives were hard but how they overcame their obstacles. I related his situation to the literacy we had shared in class to show him how education could change a life. I asked him, not told him, to give education another chance. I offered him my hand and together, we stepped back into our school.

I wonder if, two years ago I would have done this, if I would have been able to see how much this child needed a safe place and how much he just needed someone who cared. The truth is, I don’t know. But I do know that on Tuesday, I made a difference and got a child to buy back into education, all by changing my perception and using this change to guide my practice as a teacher.
I am very thankful for this class, for these readings, and for all of the wonderful stories and feedback you all have given. I am glad that my perceptions and beliefs have been changed and I am now a better teacher because of it.
Whitney Gilbert

There are times in life when the question of knowing if one can think differently than one thinks, and perceive differently than one sees, is absolutely necessary if one is to go on looking and reflecting at all. Michel Foucault

When I first read the syllabus for this course and the three quotes included in the introductory information, I knew I was going to be stretched. Although I am not going to focus on the quotation by Roland Barthes, I have pondered the concept of “text of bliss” throughout this course and can say that with each new reading I have come to understand the meaning a little more. The Foucault quote is a “text of bliss” for me. My initial thought was that there was no way one course on race, class, and gender in relation to literacy learning would change my thoughts on these subjects. After all, I completed my undergraduate work almost twenty years ago, and I have had ample time in the “real” world to develop views that are founded on facts and not my personal biases and assumptions or ideas acquired from an admired professor. I really felt that I had a good grasp on these issues. Unfortunately, I did not even realize I had never been forced to wrestle with these issues deeply—to peer into my soul to see the good, the bad, and the ugly. It is all there.

I suppose Foucault’s quote unsettles me because by this time in my life I should not have to think differently, right? Is not part of maturity the stability in knowing what one believes and why? And, the way I have thought and what I have thought have served me well for many years. Why change now? If I choose to allow myself to think differently now does that mean that my prior way of thinking was wrong? At the heart of these conversations I had with myself was the notion that I was right. If I were right, there was no need to think differently, to perceive differently.

To say that this course has been a transformational journey for me is an understatement. Not only did I not know where I was going, I did not even know I needed to go! And yet within the first two weeks of reading The Skin that We Speak the map began to unfold and I started to chart a course. I realized my need to think differently. I came to understand the intimate ties each one has with her mother language. I saw the unfairness in the fact that Dowdy and Smith’s skin spoke so loudly that neither would have been heard in their mother language. I also realized that I had not truly respected my student’s home language. I did not see it as brilliant.

Probably the hardest part of allowing myself to think differently is the struggle to respect my own identity. In one of my posts I asked the question, “How will I value Ebonics without disrespecting my own home language?” It was in writing that post that I realized I was, for the first time, struggling in the same way that many students struggle. I finally got it—the issue is not language, it is identity. How can a child assume I am not trying to change who she is when I am constantly trying to change her language?

I think the key is in giving the student a voice, in convincing her of the power of being able to communicate her own story, the things that matter most to her. That teaching is a form of social activism had not occurred to me prior to this class. While I have always believed that teaching is one of the noblest professions because of the possibility of positively impacting another’s life, I guess I had not really considered it as social activism. But now I am convinced that more important than giving a student the tools to succeed in life, literacy is the key to giving the student a voice. But this voice does not come just with the development of reading and writing skills. It comes because someone listens to the student and values what she says. I think about Tamisha and her coming to voice. It was because of the time Henry was willing to give and the respect she showed Tamisha and the other girls with whom she worked. My allowing a student to come to voice requires that I recognize the value of what she has to share now.

I also learned a great deal about myself as I read the lives of Laurie and Jake through the eyes of Deborah Hicks. The most telling moment was when I caught myself being surprised that Jake’s father was an avid reader of non-fiction, content-laden material. I stated in my post, “Just I was not expecting Hicks to state that Jake’s father read informational books regularly, I did not expect there to be strong family support for Jake’s literacy learning. It bothers me greatly that I was surprised by this. Have I been socialized in such a discourse that I assume if the values of home and school conflict it must be because home practices are not supportive of school practices?” My assumptions and pre-conceived ideas reared their ugly heads. I realized that I, as a middle-class teacher, have been socialized to a particular discourse. Therefore, I must allow myself to think and perceive differently if I am going to be an effective teacher.

In the years that I have been away from the classroom many things have changed. My decision to enroll in graduate school was because I realized I could not afford to re-enter this world unprepared. While I wanted to learn new theories and practices, I do not think I considered that what I would gain from graduate school would be a new me. And now that I have started on this journey I want to continue to be willing to change, not just my methods but my thinking. If I want to change lives I must read lives. It is impossible for me to read lives if I am not willing to think differently. I still have a long way to go, but I have at this transitional point in my life answered the critical question. Yes, I know I can think differently—I can go on looking and reflecting.

Lisa Rasey

“There are times in life when the question of knowing if one can think differently than one thinks, and perceive differently than one sees, is absolutely necessary if one is to go on looking and reflecting at all.” I interpret this quote to mean that people grow through reflection, and true reflection occurs when people think outside of their comfort zone or learn in a way they are not used to learning material. Through thinking outside of a comfort zone, people may develop feelings they have not experienced before, and learn from those feelings. In The Skin that we Speak, we read about students who were required to “think differently than one thinks, and perceive differently than one sees” because of their heritage or background these students entered school differently than other students from the majority group. They entered school with the responsibility to think differently than they were used to thinking and interpret things differently because of the language they speak. I agree with Foucault when he states thinking and developing new ideas of a subject through questioning is absolutely necessary. Teachers are expected to reflect everyday, as they consider how the lessons they have designed reached their students. This type of reflection is necessary, as well as reflection of literature. Especially reflecting on literature that presents ideas that test the attitude the reader has of the subject, and the literature we read in class tested my attitude towards the subjects addressed.

The literature we read in this class tested my understanding of how students from minorities feel about “thinking differently than one thinks”. By reading the literature I understand how to design instruction to fit the needs of all learners, the content and ideas represented in the literature have tested my attitude towards students of a minority group or working class family. Most importantly, while I was reading the text I questioned my own thinking and ideas and reflected on those ideas. I want to identify the important sections of the text that helped me do this.

In The Skin that We Speak, I learned about students from minority groups who were affected by the need to speak, act, and learn differently at school than they were expected to speak, act, and learn at home. They were required to think differently than one thinks, in terms of language. I read about students who questioned whether they could think differently than they were conditioned to think because of their heritage. These students were expected to develop hybrid identities if they wished to survive and excel in school. For example, Dowdy described her experience in the school system and the need to change her identity: “I invented a character that wanted to please her teachers and her dead mother”. Dowdy was different from other authors in the text, because her mother wished that she spoke a specific form of language that can be viewed as the language of intelligent people. Therefore, Dowdy experienced pressure at home and at school. Like all of the authors, I feel her experience of “thinking differently” contributed and influenced how she developed her identity. Later in life Dowdy participated in activities at work where she wrote small skits about the local people, and played their roles in the skits. Dowdy reflected on the experience: “The chains fell from around my tongue, and my brain began to feel as if it were oiled and moving along without hiccups”. She continued by stating that her life was then legitimized: “All of the shades of my existence could be called into the performance medium, and I, at last, could feel integrated”. I want all students, regardless of their background to understand that their life and feelings are legitimate. If they do not understand this before school, there are things teachers can do in school to help them understand.

I reflect on Baker’s chapter in The Skin that we Speak, because she identified one to build understanding in the classroom. Baker states that teaching students about “trilingualism” will help them build awareness of the need to develop a formal and professional language while accepting their home language. In the book she discussed how to utilize and the approach trilingualism, which I think is very important but because we have all read the information I will not include details of how to incorporate the idea into classroom instruction. Instead, I want to reiterate the main idea of “trilingualism”. In the trilingualism approach students learn about the three types of language that are important to develop: home, formal, and professional English. Baker defines the forms of language as the following: home English, or dialect, is the language most students develop at home or from peers; Formal, or academic, English is developed in school and through the text available at school; Professional English is the language that is developed in college or while working. From Bakers description in the book, I have concluded that the most important detail of the instruction of the “trilingualism” approach is to teach the students to respect each type of language in hopes the students will then be willing to use the best language form when appropriate. I feel the activities Baker identified in the chapter will enable students to question a different way of thinking and speaking. Students are also allowed the opportunity to reflect on their discussions of the different languages, which Foucault states is necessary.

As I reflected on what I have learned this semester from the texts, I realized one very important thing. These texts tested ideas and notions that I had of working-class children, and after reading the text my thoughts changed. I think differently than I thought before reading them. Before this class, my understanding of the working class children and the relationship to literacy came from being a working class student. I attended rural school systems where textbooks stayed at school because there was not enough money to replace them if students lost the books. Both of my parents were from a working class background as well, just as most of my friends’ parents were. I understood the restrictions that can be placed on a student, for example the monetary restrictions that affect the materials that are available. I also understood how the time parents have to devote to their children could affect their learning like spending time reading, and I understood that in a working-class setting parents values and goals are different. I was not aware of the specific examples that were found through research of these families that I became aware of by reading, Reading Lives: Working Class Children and Literacy Learning. For example, Hicks research identified problems Jake had with classroom instruction because of the value his father placed on learning by doing. Jake’s father states: “All they had to do was find ways to connect students’ interest with academic tasks”. Before reading the text I thought that teachers could link the material to students interest and the student would learn by reading interesting text. The ideas Hicks’ presented through research and the idea that reading and writing is a cultural and cognitive process, makes me feel that presenting interesting material is important but it is also important to develop a sense of belonging for students. I think differently than I do about the relationship of working class students and literacy, as I just described, but I want to know more. I want to understand how to teach students like Jake and Laurie because they are teachable.

All students are able to learn, and our job as teachers is to collaborate to build ideas when our own ideas do not work. We need to set a goal to attempt to think differently than one typically thinks and step outside of the box to brainstorm to meet the needs of students. Our reflection of these things will only make us stronger as teachers.

Elizabeth Griffin

There are times in life when the question of knowing if one can think differently than one thinks, and perceive differently than one sees, is absolutely necessary if one is to go on looking and reflecting at all.
Michel Foucault

This has been a very powerful class for me. I never thought that an online format could produce so much thinking and internalizing in myself. I believe it was the first podcast from Dr. Jackson that said we should try to be as open as possible during our readings and posts. I haven’t that of that, until just now, after reading this quote. My ways of thinking has taken a dramatic shift. I am very surprised. I tend to be a very stubborn and outspoken person. However, I believe my thinking has shifted because it needed to. I deeply care for my students. They really are part of my family and I always want the best for them. The readings in this course have led me to the realization that I must respect my students on a deeper level than what I had been doing. And until I can do that, I will hinder them in reaching their true potential.

After reading the Dowdy article, I realized the power of being able to code switch. I laughed at and blamed professionals who use improper English. Several months later, I also saw the power in teachers using students’ language. I tried it recently on the playground. Other teachers were standing near me, and the words flew out of my mouth before I could stop them, “Go on witch your badself girl. You show dem boys how it’s done!” I used the hand and eye roll thing too. I knew if I thought about it for too long, I wouldn’t actually do it. I was afraid of the “look” from the other teachers. I think I was also afraid of how goofy I would sound. But I reached a little girl who is usually very timid and shy around me. She thought it was the funniest thing. She came out of her shell that day. She has been more confident and more willing to answer my questions. And I wonder if she saw how vulnerable I was, and saw that lightning didn’t strike me. Or maybe she even saw my happiness. Whatever it was, it helped. So, thanks to this course, I have discovered that code switching can go both ways.

With most of the readings in this course, I think of the novel Beloved, by Toni Morrison. That novel showed me just how important identity is to each and every one of us. When I think back to the Situated Histories chapter, I remember that each child comes to my room with their own identity. They have come from nothing. Even if it seems like nothing to the person next door, it is SOMETHING. I have to try my best to help them build and add onto that identity and make it much stronger. Today, I was speaking with a teacher who has a student that is starting to become a behavior problem. This particular student has a very difficult home life. There is a lot of violence, neglect and drugs. She pulled him aside today and asked him why he was acting the way he was. After a really long talk, he finally said, “It’s just what happens. When you get old you get bad.” And it troubled me to think that he already had chosen his path in life. This teacher and I both vowed to show him all HIS possibilities that he has in life. But we are walking a fine line. We do not want him to think we are changing who he is. We want to show him what he can be, and what he can accomplish.

Since I have read the chapter Fiction of Girlhood, I have had to really analyze my teaching. If any moment of the day has been wasted or I have thought, “Well let me just sit her and relax for a minute”, I think of the little girl, Laurie. She needed every ounce of her teachers’ energy. She needed the instruction specific to her. And even though I KNOW this is what all students need, I still have lazy moments. But since I have read this chapter, my lazy moments happen less frequently and are much shorter!

For each article and each chapter that I have read in this course, I always think of my students. This is partly because this is a professional setting, but it is also because this is my life. I really never think of teaching as a career, but as a huge facet of my life. But I have also come to realization that I have applied these readings to my personal life as well. I’m not nearly as judgmental of my friends as I once was (and I say this like to has been years- but it has only been a few months). This was a huge problem that I was having. In fact, one of the roommates actually moved out because of it. She thought that I resented her and liked her less because she never finished college. And I will be honest; I had a BIG problem with it. I knew she could do better. That was my rationale. She could do better. And I kept saying it. But I don’t think I ever really asked her what she wanted out of life. I regret that. I regret that I didn’t take this class earlier. I wish I could have had a more open heart before she choose to move out. I was forcing an identity on her, that wasn’t hers. And now that I see that, I see her for who she is. I really do SEE. Life is too short to place judgment on others. It is too short to put people in “groups”. We really do need to see everyone for who they ARE.
Sarah Feinman

This course has defiantly been intriguing and inspiring. It has truly made me grow as a student, educator, and person. As we teach and live our lives there are so many things that we lose sight of. Not only have I learned to be more reflective, I have learned to be open minded, proactive in our schools and an active listener, not only to my colleagues but with my students, families and even my friends.

As I read over the quotes I couldn’t decide which one to pick. All three were so closely related to all that I have learned this semester. I ended up choosing two to reflect further upon.
There are times in life when the question of knowing if one can think differently than one thinks ,and perceive differently than one sees,
is absolutely necessary if one is to go on looking and reflecting at all.
Michel Foucault
Text of pleasure: the text that contents, fills, grants euphoria; the text that comes from culture and does not break with it, is linked to a comfortable practice of reading.
Text of bliss: the text that imposes a state of loss, the text that discomforts, unsettles the reader’s historical cultural, psychological assumptions, the consistency of his [sic] tastes, values, memories, brings to a crisis his [sic] relation with language.
Roland Barthes

At the start of the semester I thought I was prepared for this class to be different than any course I had taken in format and content. I thought that I reflected often on my classes, students, families and life so this class would support that. However, as I began to read the works in The Skin That We Speak, as well as the articles and Reading Lives I realized that I only reflect on what I choose to and that I don’t usually push myself to consider things outside of my comfort zone or to read text of bliss. My reflections were hindered by my closed mindedness and I didn’t even know it. As I read this semester I couldn’t help but wonder why is it that teachers go through the education program in so many universities, planning to be prepared to teach but yet not one course prepares us to understand the importance of our tone, presentation, implication, attitude or the acceptance and importance of children’s language. It was not until this class, which is an elective that I really thought through all of these issues. It is no wonder that new teachers, and even older teachers, go into classrooms and fail.

As I first started reading The Skin That We Speak I realized I had several biased and wasn’t as open-minded as I thought. My idea that every child needed to learn ‘standard English’ and that Ebonics was not a real language is something that I know now was a misconception and understanding that I had. Before I posted that first post I felt uneasy and wondered how others felt about the issue. I also wondered was I going to like this course and the views that it may present. I was very defensive because what the author was saying put me out of my comfort zone. However I realized as I read that by denying kids there native language in school I am denying them there family values and culture. As I read several of our readings and even a children’s book, Elijah of Buxton, this semester I felt what I feel many of these kids feel as they try and make sense and connect to what we are teaching. In Elijah of Buxton, Elijah spoke a dialect that is different from my own. I found myself reading slower and having a harder time getting into the story. It really made me think about how kids feel when reading a book outside of their native language/dialect. The book was no longer a text of pleasure. Many times we assume that kids should be reading for enjoyment however when the task of reading is a difficult one or the text does not flow with what they already know then they are no longer able to read for pleasure.

One thing I knew prior to this class but have truly realized this semester through our readings is that the path to reaching certain students and teaching them may not be easy, but with encouragement, dedication, and the right teaching it can happen. Kohl’s comment about how “New teachers (I think even veteran teachers, also), if they do not come from communities that are similar to those they teach in, are particularly vulnerable to miscommunication.”. This hit home for me especially as I read about Donny and his family. So many times we have had parents that we wish we could reach and talk to but can never get in touch with. This mother was so dedicated to making sure her son had a future that she was even willing to admit that she was illiterate to everyone at the school. She made sure they knew she could not read their notes but for them to call anytime they needed her to know something. It is scary to think that situations like these occur all the time and may have even occurred in my classroom and I didn’t even recognize it. Every year we come in contact with kids from a wide range of backgrounds and lifestyles. Instead of blaming the student and families for the difficulties we are facing in class we need to reflect on the situation and why the method(s) we are using at school are not working.

On another note, Judith Baker has the right idea. Her theory of trilingualism truly categorizes language. As students get older they need to be taught and be aware of the different types of language and situations you would use them in. I loved how Baker worked to make the kids aware of their similarities and differences, as well as made them the judge of when certain types of language are appropriate versus not. She not only helped the students understand each other but gave them a better understanding of society. It really made me think about the fact that as teachers we stray away from topics and books that might be controversial or topics that may lead to a conversation that might take us out of our comfort zone or in other words text of bliss. So often we only encourage children to read for pleasure, because that is what we do. We fear what others might think and especially what parents might say. But we forget about whose needs we should really be thinking about, the children. Even as parents we try to “protect” our children from the real world. The truth is that so often they already know about the things we are “protecting” them from. Inevitably we are only hurting them by not giving them the opportunity to share their feelings and interpretations. As parents and educators we need to remember how important literature that discusses social issues and discussions about them is in helping our children grow and have a deeper understanding of the world. As Moller and Allen stated, “ If we pretend that we live in a world where these things do not happen, we not only reveal ourselves as dishonest to children, who often know more than we give them credit for , but we also fail to prepare them for the world that we and they must work together to change.” We need to work towards being proactive in helping our children understand the situations they face daily and the world around them.

Not only do we need to push kids to read text of bliss but as adults and educators we need to push ourselves to read text of bliss. Prior to this class I would never have picked up a novel that was solely written around research. It is out of my comfort zone and therefore I avoided it. I didn’t realize how truly valuable these types of literature truly are, especially in education. The articles we read and the book Reading Lives made me realize how more qualitative research and less quantitative is needed to truly understand what is going on in education and that as teachers how we need to read, reflect upon and be proactive for qualitative research. I would have to agree with Hinchman in that if we want to really focus on why kids aren’t performing they way that we would like then we need to do more qualitative research to pinpoint the problem.

The idea of teaching is so complex and one that takes deep thought and open mindedness. Thanks to this course I feel that I am more capable of being open minded and willing to think differently than I normally would.
Amy Spade

There are times in life when the question of knowing if one can think differently than one thinks, and perceive differently than one sees, is absolutely necessary if one is to go on looking and reflecting at all.
~ Michel Foucault

I chose this quote by Foucault because throughout this course I have found myself reflecting on the way I do things and thinking about how I think. I cannot think of another course in which I have spent so much time on self reflection. Through this course I have grown both personally and professionally.
The Skin that We Speak by Delpit and Dowdy certainly made me reflect. While I did not necessarily agree with everything that was written in the book, it certainly opened my eyes and my mind. I think back to Joanne Dowdy’s story, how she developed two separate languages. The influence of Dowdy’s mother led to the development of these two “languages”. While most of us do not have examples that extreme, many of us can relate to the “dual languages”.
One of the chapters from The Skin that We Speak made me question myself by asking the question “Do I give permission to fail?” I have had several EC students over the years, where I feel I did not demand enough of these students because it was too hard on me. That’s right I said me. The problem with self reflection is that you often see things you would rather not see. The text made me realize that I was doing an injustice to these students and myself by giving them permission to fail.
Ebonics is where I had the most difficulty in agreeing with the text. I have trouble considering it an actual language and not slang. I believe in Standard English. Ebonics may be acceptable for use in the home and streets it is not acceptable in the classroom and workplace. I live in an area with very few blacks; we have a great deal of Hispanics and Hmong. Of course we have translators for these languages during conferences and meetings. I cannot imagine having an Ebonics translator.
The stories of Danny and Zonnie, the American Indians, made me realize that motivation is a crucial part of teaching. Here were two bright children who should have done well in school but didn’t because they were not sufficiently motivated. I looked back to that particular blog and ended my post with “I need to broaden by definition of success; I need to find ways to reach every child.” I look at my students differently than I did in December, before I started this course. Instead of expecting each child to reach a goal, I encourage each student to do their personal best. Mayci’s best isn’t the same as Hailey’s but each is learning and doing their best. It’s all we can ask.
One of my favorite readings of the course was the story of the young men from the Sudan. Reading about the lives of these young men seemed to put my world into perspective. Things that I deal with every day, that are a constant source of worry and stress, pale next to what these young men had to endure just to survive. My world is limited to right here, right now, because I have limited it. I need to step back and examine the larger picture, the one that says I do make a difference in a child’s life. I have the ability to change the world, one student at a time. Will I accept the challenge or will I continue to live day to day, problem to problem, with blinders on?
The book by Deborah Hicks Reading Lives; Working Class Children and Literacy Learning was another thought provoking piece of the puzzle. The stories of Laurie and Jake are the untold stories of countless other children; children in my county, in my school, in my classroom. Through this book I explored new thoughts on the working class children of my school. While I grew up in a working class family, my family valued education above all things. That is a major difference in stories of Jake and many of the students in my classroom. Parents may pay lip service to the value of education, but the reality is that a myriad of other things come first. I have a student who is struggling in school, and the parents ask what they can do to help their child succeed. Yet three weeks before testing, the very same family has taken their child out of school to go to the beach. Another students family went to the beach the week after Easter break, missing an entire week of school. Another family went to Disney the week before Easter. I believe while the parents in my classroom say education is important, they truly believe a vacation is more important.
I have decided to make some changes during the next school year due to the readings of this course. I have already spoken to my principal about doing home visits next year. I am very excited about the possibilities of visiting my future students and relationships that I hope will develop. I also want to involve parents and families more next year, so that we are working together as a single unit. I feel that parents and I are on separate teams, not working together as we should.
As I went back and reread some of the blogs that I have posted this semester, almost all of them have ended with a comment on the thoughts that the readings have provoked. As I mentioned earlier I have reflected more on my teaching style and beliefs and the everyday matters of teaching than I ever have. I like the fact that this course made me look at myself and question what I do. I believe I am a better teacher today than I was before I started this class. I have also learned a skill that I will continue- to constantly self evaluate- never settle, do not take things for face value, find a way to make a change. My students deserve to have a teacher who loves, motivates and inspires.
SuSu Watson

Text of pleasure: the text that contents, fills, grants euphoria; the text that comes from culture
and does not break with it, is linked to a comfortable practice of reading.
Text of bliss: the text that imposes a state of loss, the text that discomforts, unsettles the reader’s
historical cultural, psychological assumptions, the consistency of his [sic] tastes, values,
memories, brings to a crisis his [sic] relation with language.
Roland Barthes

This course was unlike any other course that I have taken as a student. I have learned and gained valuable information from every course that I have taken, but this course was different. I never would have thought that I would get so much out of an online course. Here I didn't just learn and gain. Here I was challenged to internalize uncomfortable ideas and make mirror image reflections about myself, both as an individual and as a teacher. I was forced to see me for who I am, then with each word, coaxed to make a change in my methods for the sake of my students. Each week I "met" students in stories and articles that look like the children that I teach, love, and truly care about. And I could not be content with what is happening in the educational world around me, nor in my own classroom. I know that I am supposed to reflect all the time and I do, but for the first time in a long time, I didn't just generate a reflection. I analyzed and evaluated my reflections, with my students and my personal desire to grow as an educator in mind.

As I have mentioned in a couple of my other blogs, I am an avid reader. There is nothing more that I love to do in life (besides scrapbooking and family time) than read. Of course I have my favorite authors and I stalk Barnes and Noble whenever my favorite writers publish something new. I am your classic "for pleasure" reader. Reading makes me feel good all over. There is nothing like reading a great book and the sense of accomplishment that I have when I finish reading it. I read for a variety of reasons, but mostly I read to escape my own major and minute problems. A bigger problem means more novels, and a minute problem can be ‘made better’ with just one novel. Yes, for me, pleasure text is a part of who I am. These are not text that I read looking for change or self-evaluation, but are text that are the equivalent of me watching my favorite evening TV drama on the tube.

Unfortunately for the students that we read about in The Skin That We Speak and Reading Lives, text for pleasure was a far-fetched goal because the world of literacy was seemingly not created for them. As I read research study after research study two things consistenly happened. 1) My heart broke for the students that I read about and other students in our country experiencing the same frustration and 2) A glimmer of hope flickered within, knowning that research is being done, and teachers just like the ones that signed up for this class are willing to make changes in our own classrooms to make learning truly an equal opportunity for ALL students. As a black girl growing up in the public schools of America, I had first hand experience on how language, race, gender, ethnicity, and culture could positively or negatively impact a minority child’s educational experience. Even at that, it looks a little different now that I am on the teacher side of the coin. Nothing in my teacher education courses prepared me to teach with those things in mind. A professor once told me to teach the student and not the subject. Eight years ago I did not fully understand what she meant. While reading and blogging for this class I began to make sense of what my professor was charging me to do.

I have no question that the text and articles that we engaged in throughout the semester were text of bliss. These texts certainly caused feeling of unsettlement and discomfort as I reflected on my teaching practices and the students that might be getting left behind in my classroom, because I have not done enough to give them a voice and let them be “heard”. Before this class, I had the attitude that I already knew enough about racial and gender struggles through first hand experience so what more could I possibly learn. The answer is, I learned a lot. I was not the perfect equal opportunity, all is fair in my classroom type of teacher that I thought I was. My thinking and my classroom delivery were challenged with each research study that I read. I asked myself so many "Why did I?", "How can I make it better?", "What do I do with this knowledge?" questions. The answers took a lot of soul searching and some of my questions are still in the process of being answered. The internal change that has happened to me personally and professionally is one that will have a lasting impression, not only on me, but the students that I will reach as I strive to meet them where they are.

I think the study that had the most impact on me were the stories of Danny, Zonnie, and Laurie. How do we let smart children fall through the cracks of education? Why is America, the home of the melting pot, a place where schools devalue and undermine the abilities of children that are different? While I can’t do anything about America, I can make a difference in my small part of the world. Before taking this class, there were things that I was already doing in my classroom to try to make all students feel included, but I have gained many more strategies to do this effectively. As a result of my many self-evaluative reflections I view teaching and my responsibility to my students in a fresh light. This experience has been a journey that I am grateful to have been a part of. I will be sure to look for bliss texts in the future so that I can continue to evolve and reflect.

Cherrita Hayden-McMillan